Washington at Valley Forge (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
Cold Drills
One winter,
Valley Forge forged
An army.
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Labor Unions
Killing geese
That laid golden eggs –
GM and….
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Pastoral Painting
Green pasture,
White cattle egrets,
Black Angus.
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* The haiku I write are lines of 3-5-3 syllables instead of 5-7-5.
See Haiku article here for explanation, if needed: https://thebardonthehill.wordpress.com/2011/08/08/haiku/
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© Dennis Lange and thebardonthehill.wordpress.com, 2012.
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Each one if these is good for its own reasons. Being a lover of history, I think I like the first one best, and the play on words is perfect. It captures what really happened with that one subtle shift from using ‘forge’ as a noun to making it the main verb.
But then the third offers such dynamic color. I can definitely SEE the picture …. It’s hard to choose. Is one of them your favorite?
Because they’re so different, it’s difficult for me to decide, too, but perhaps the first. It captures what might have been the pivotal moment in the war, has the change in use of “forge” that you pointed out and has the traditional “haiku” turn in that an “army” went to Valley Forge for the winter but an ARMY came forth. The last isn’t a normal haiku since it doesn’t have the turn. Its purpose was to paint a picture and it made it vivid for me. I’m glad it evoked the same response in you, and perhaps others. 🙂 Thanks for reading.
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