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Archive for the ‘Limericks’ Category

Lincoln inaugural

It looked dim for Lincoln’s election
To second term till changed complexion.
Sheridan o’er Early won;
Atlanta burned till it was done.
The army assured Abe’s selection.

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© Dennis Allen Lange, 2019.

 

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n6zjt9Y


Some Britons have lost all their senses

In saying that lads may have menses.
For the sake of the sane
And those with a brain,
Keep fools far away with good fences.

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https://www.breitbart.com/europe/2018/12/16/schools-eight-year-olds-boys-periods/?utm_medium=social&utm_source=facebook&fbclid=IwAR0ZChSkw3PmcvdLGnJDWwm46bjoCHnk_LwgUMQ6bWWhgyRxSXBmf6YUAXs

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photo by Jo Spargo at http://www.rgbstock.com/photo/n6zjt9Y/Silverton+2

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© Dennis Allen Lange, 2019.

 

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2dyVpde

The headline drips blood and is gory;
Alarmingly tells of lost glory.
Read deeper, you’ll find
‘Twas merely a line.
The title ne’er matches the story.

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photo by Dez Pain at http://www.rgbstock.com/photo/2dyVpde/News+Headlines

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© Dennis Allen Lange, 2019.

 

 

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nf084vq

Each dressed in a tux for a wedding,
Not sure where they’re walking or heading.
Said one to the other,
“Don’t know ‘bout you brother,”
But here in this tux I am sweating.”

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photo by Nicolas Raymond at
http://www.rgbstock.com/photo/nF084VQ/African+Penguins

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* The haiku I write are lines of 3-5-3 syllables instead of 5-7-5.

See Haiku article here for explanation, if needed: https://thebardonthehill.wordpress.com/2011/08/08/haiku/
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© Dennis Allen Lange and thebardonthehill.wordpress.com, 2019.

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donkey

When you listen to crying and Murdercrat fears,
And media lying through crocodile tears,
You’ll miss the big news
They try to defuse:
The nation is better than it’s been in years.

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© Dennis Allen Lange and thebardonthehill.wordpress.com, 2018.

 

 

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kfc

There once was a man from Kentucky,
Whose fortune was made by the clucky
(Chickens, that is);
The recipe his,
Sans feathers, it made him quite plucky.

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© Dennis Allen Lange and thebardonthehill.wordpress.com, 2018.

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stop abortion now


That party should ever lie fallow;
Let’s bury them deep and not shallow.
Deserving, it dies
For murder it plies.
And may we its grave never hallow.

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Voting for Murdercrats makes one an accessory to the 2500
abortion murders that occur in this nation each day.

https://www.minenotthenine.com/2017/03/

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© Dennis Allen Lange and thebardonthehill.wordpress.com, 2018.

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earth


In orbit ’round Sun, Earth is curling,
While top-like on axis it’s whirling.
Hold on to your seat!
,,,There’s more to the feat,
For farther through space we are hurling!

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© Dennis Allen Lange and thebardonthehill.wordpress.com, 2018.

 

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Fort Fisher


Ben Butler called Fisher too solid.
Grant fired him, which Ben thought was squalid.
He showed a committee
His proof, wanting pity.
They listened, their faces all stolid.

But news came, and streets filled with cheering.
Fort Fisher had fallen; the hearing
Was filled with great laughter
Which Butler joined after,
Concluding that Ord was unfearing.

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After the Union’s General Benjamin Butler was removed by Grant and replaced by Ord, Butler went before a Congressional Committee to plead his case. In the midst of that hearing, while Butler was explaining with charts and graphs and maps that Fort Fisher was impregnable, newspaper boys began shouting the headline that Fort Fisher had fallen and cheering began in the street. “Impossible!” was Butler’s first response but a message was soon sent into the room confirming it. Laughter spread through the room and Butler finally joined in. He concluded with, “Thank God for victory.”

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Another poem of mine about Fort Fisher:
https://thebardonthehill.wordpress.com/2017/03/30/fort-fisher-sounds-by-dennis-allen-lange/

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© Dennis Allen Lange and thebardonthehill.wordpress.com, 2018.

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mWIHC4M


I can’t spend the night in Poughkeepsie,
Though I’m tired and the whole world seems tipsy.
I’ve farther to go
And must not e’en slow.
I’m footloose and free as a gypsy.

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photo by Karen Kelly at
http://www.rgbstock.com/photo/mWIHC4M/vacancy

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© Dennis Allen Lange and thebardonthehill.wordpress.com, 2018.

 

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