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The Antiseptic Baby and the Prophylactic Pup
Were playing in the garden when the Bunny gamboled up;
They looked upon the Creature with a loathing undisguised; –
It wasn’t Disinfected and it wasn’t Sterilized.
They said it was a Microbe and a Hotbed of Disease;
They steamed it in a vapor of a thousand-odd degrees;
They froze it in a freezer that was cold as Banished Hope
And washed it in permanganate with carbonated soap.
In sulphureted hydrogen they steeped its wiggly ears;
They trimmed its frisky whiskers with a pair of hard-boiled shears;
They donned their rubber mittens and they took it by the hand
And ‘lected it a member of the Fumigated Band.
There’s not a Micrococcus in the garden where they play;
They bathe in pure iodoform a dozen times a day;
And each imbibes his rations from a Hygienic Cup –
The Bunny and the Baby and the Prophylactic Pup.
The Bard on the Hill 
When I ran across this poem, I decided to publish it here because of the movie “Contagion” that is currently in theaters. I’ve heard comments by those who have seen it and it seems like they might want to join the Fumigated Band. 🙂 I would have posted a picture of Howard Hughes with the poem if I had found one I liked since he was a freak about germs.
LOL I do like this one…
Good one. When was it written?
One source says it was first published in 1906 and so it was probably written about then or shortly before that time.
You are kidding! This was written in 1906? It’s great! It feels so contemporary in our germaphobic antibacterial hand wash society. . Although I didn’t recognize sulphureted hydrogen as a current disinfectant. 🙂
I swipe all my pics from Google images. You might be able to find Howie Mandel’s picture. He is afraid to shake hands or touch people. Still, Howard Hughes photo would be ideal.